Miss Universe

This is more likely the 27th time I`m sitting down, determined to write my first entrance on this blog. After looking at a blank screen now for 20 minutes, I started thinking about why its so damn hard to write these 300 words( other than the fact that its a beautiful day and I would love to go to the pool). Im realizing that I actually have a lot of stuff I would like to write, but everytime I start typing, I reach the conclusion that it is too much of a clichè, too idealistic or too romantizising. They`re all things I would have written about a year ago when coming to MUWCI for the first time, but after spending a year here the notion of idealism is just another clichè along with peace on earth and complaining about the caf food. I used to have so many romantic ideas of the world before coming here, but slowly my illusions of what is possible to achieve grew more distant and I realize I`ve become one of those people who rolles their eyes during college meetings when someone wants to discuss cultural sensitivity or enviromental issues. Not that I don`t care, Im just lacking my previously naive view that I could change the world( yet another MUWCI-clichè).
Its quite sad to see the illusions you had about yourself and the world disperse in the heat of the Indian countryside. We come here to be educated and enlightened and to "make a difference", but what can you do if you don`t actually believe in the change you`re suppose to make? Sometimes I wish I could go back to my more naive state of mind when I actually believed in all the clichèes about the envionment, world peace and so on and when I could write about it without feeling Im quoting an extract from the speech of a Miss Universe contestant...